THE BIG FAT INDIAN WEDDING(in the eyes of a fifteen year-old)
THE BIG FAT INDIAN WEDDING(in the eyes of a fifteen year-old)
The Indian wedding is quite a spectacle by itself.
In every other part of the world,a marriage is an bond which is formed in front of
a dozen people and a clergyman.but,in India, it signifies much more.
I mean..much,much more.............................................
So, where do I start?
Let's start with the important bit.
The Indian marriage is unarguably a major status symbol.
Well,this does sound cliche,but,the truth rings around its seeming innocence.
This particular issue has two dimensions-the people at the affording end and the one at the receiving end. Let us start with the first party...
Be it the marriage hall, or the car the couple come in, or the wedding feast,or even which important guests are invited, the family tries its best to put their best foot forward.
The second party are introspects.They try to review the wedding party's grandeur.They fit into the 'opposition party' role which in the end brings in balance in the way things are run (when i say 'opposition party',I do not mean the 'Indian-walla' which tries to snap, bite and chew the ruling government ,somewhat like a dog, let's keep the U.S.model for now).
Let us now go into the dynamics of Indian wedding guests-
As far as I have observed,I am in a position to classify them into three major groups.
1) The VVIP's-This group of people include those who are in the innermost circles of the family and actually care as to whether the wedding goes smoothly.These are the people who actually look forward to the wedding and most of the times, even take part in the preparations.In most cases, they are the ones with the extravagant gifts (unless one has the 'can buy it all' distant relative) .
2)The reviewers-These are the second ring of relatives you see once or twice in a year.
They are the one who start to review the in-laws by looks and visible culture.In my opinion, they are they the ones who face 'socialite-obligation-compulsion-phenomenon' i.e. they are more or less forced to come to the marriage because....1-The wedding party had attended their family's wedding a few years ago................or.....................2-They want the the wedding party to attend the marriage they are going to conduct in the near future.
3)The hoggers-This is the group I can best relate to(with all my fairness).
These are the people who don't even know whose wedding they are attending.These people are what I call the 'floaters'.These people just stick around in the edge of the photo and run along to the dining hall to do their bit.They are usually the kind whom you don't intentionally invite.Seriously,what can you do if your walking friend's second cousin turns up?
Let us talk about another important aspect now...the economics of Indian marriages.
This is the non-elegant part of thee Indian marriage system.
Many Indians believe that marriage ceremony is the pinnacle of their life.Hence making them believe that it is time to 'cash-out'. I myself have heard people saying that they will sell themselves to fees their children's wedding. I think India as a country has more 'beti-ka-shaadi' savings accounts than 'children's education' savings accounts......another aspect which is unique only to India.
You are coming to the end of this article, but, how can we talk about Indian weddings and not speak about dowry and the anti-dowry hype.well, I haven't understood this part as solidly as I should have as of yet, but, being a part of the largest youth population in the world, I have understood one thing proper....'it is very fashionable to refuse dowry in the modern age'.
The Indian wedding is quite a spectacle by itself.
In every other part of the world,a marriage is an bond which is formed in front of
a dozen people and a clergyman.but,in India, it signifies much more.
I mean..much,much more.............................................
So, where do I start?
Let's start with the important bit.
The Indian marriage is unarguably a major status symbol.
Well,this does sound cliche,but,the truth rings around its seeming innocence.
This particular issue has two dimensions-the people at the affording end and the one at the receiving end. Let us start with the first party...
Be it the marriage hall, or the car the couple come in, or the wedding feast,or even which important guests are invited, the family tries its best to put their best foot forward.
The second party are introspects.They try to review the wedding party's grandeur.They fit into the 'opposition party' role which in the end brings in balance in the way things are run (when i say 'opposition party',I do not mean the 'Indian-walla' which tries to snap, bite and chew the ruling government ,somewhat like a dog, let's keep the U.S.model for now).
Let us now go into the dynamics of Indian wedding guests-
As far as I have observed,I am in a position to classify them into three major groups.
1) The VVIP's-This group of people include those who are in the innermost circles of the family and actually care as to whether the wedding goes smoothly.These are the people who actually look forward to the wedding and most of the times, even take part in the preparations.In most cases, they are the ones with the extravagant gifts (unless one has the 'can buy it all' distant relative) .
2)The reviewers-These are the second ring of relatives you see once or twice in a year.
They are the one who start to review the in-laws by looks and visible culture.In my opinion, they are they the ones who face 'socialite-obligation-compulsion-phenomenon' i.e. they are more or less forced to come to the marriage because....1-The wedding party had attended their family's wedding a few years ago................or.....................2-They want the the wedding party to attend the marriage they are going to conduct in the near future.
3)The hoggers-This is the group I can best relate to(with all my fairness).
These are the people who don't even know whose wedding they are attending.These people are what I call the 'floaters'.These people just stick around in the edge of the photo and run along to the dining hall to do their bit.They are usually the kind whom you don't intentionally invite.Seriously,what can you do if your walking friend's second cousin turns up?
Let us talk about another important aspect now...the economics of Indian marriages.
This is the non-elegant part of thee Indian marriage system.
Many Indians believe that marriage ceremony is the pinnacle of their life.Hence making them believe that it is time to 'cash-out'. I myself have heard people saying that they will sell themselves to fees their children's wedding. I think India as a country has more 'beti-ka-shaadi' savings accounts than 'children's education' savings accounts......another aspect which is unique only to India.
You are coming to the end of this article, but, how can we talk about Indian weddings and not speak about dowry and the anti-dowry hype.well, I haven't understood this part as solidly as I should have as of yet, but, being a part of the largest youth population in the world, I have understood one thing proper....'it is very fashionable to refuse dowry in the modern age'.
All said and done, India has the lowest divorce rate in whole world.
Ultimately, that is the only thing that counts or should I say.... that is the only thing that appears to count.
That is a thought for you to ponder about.
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